Memoirs of a Vagrant
by ZodiarkSavior
Summary: "Anything to rid me of these memories... these are the memories that make me human, after all..." The Cataclysm, a prophesized event of the world being born anew has come to pass. Civilization has resurrected itself anew, but at the cost of whittling memories. This tale is an expansion of Ivalice's untold history. An addendum to a Final Fantasy.
1. Prologue

_In a hundred years, knowledge of any calendar would be erased. Civilizations would turn to ash, buried deep beneath the earth, soon to be overrun by a new crust. The legacies of people and culture slipping between stained fingers of Gods and Kings, into the vast ocean of time. But even blooded water returns to its natural color. Nobody knew what the history was, and so, it was forgotten..._

_Circa Old Valendian, 800. I remember this time clearly. Its atrocities remain imprinted upon my mind years later. It was within these days friends were lost to the abyss. Families that were mended were ripped apart. Kingdoms fell as hereditary dynasties were murdered or simply forgotten amidst the chaos. Havoc and ruin swept across the land._

_If only I was not so ignorant and arrogant in my own knowledge, but like a child, I stomped onwards, aiming for petty revenge against the very Gods that were the cause of all of this…_

_I would gladly sacrifice my life if it meant to save all of what once was Ivalice…I would be a martyr that not one would remember. Not one is aware of the truth that hides behind my existence now. _

_My tears smudge the ink on this small, slightly torn piece of old parchment. Would I be a martyr instead of a pitiful vanguard? I do not care if I were to die, only if my death were meaningful. Anything to rid me of these memories…These are the memories that make me human after all…_

_Memoirs Of A Vagrant, _

_Circa Old Valendian 857_


	2. Chapter I

_Chapter I - The Hand That Rocks the Cradle_

_Circa Old Valendian, 708  
><em>

It could be said my first recollection, however obscure, could be named my birth.  
>Before this time, I remembered nothing. Should I have attempted to dwell upon the past, I would have felt mentally obstructed, as if I was akin to forever gazing unto a void; lost, essentially.<p>

I knew not purpose, nor where I hailed from. I traversed the world blindly, barely clad in tattered garments yet I cared not for I harbored no shard of decency. The world had enraptured me. All things intoxicating; every detail something new and foreign. There were no boundaries, for I had no sense of morality. Should my curiosity overtake, I would be to follow whatever seen fit. Not to learn, I had not the sentience at the time to even be aware of the concept. Not to learn, but to discover… That was instinct.

These memories are vague, that I know. That is why I deemed this time my birth. Others have said they've a trembled grasp of their birth time, so I see fit to relate. The characteristic that differentiated me from others; I never was a child. I was thrust into this world against my own accord, blissfully ignorant within my shell. Often did I receive the queer eye from others, for I was quite different…

Where this all began…? Well…

The most distinct trait of this place would be the heat that embroiled the entire expanse of sand that washed over the county. The days were hot, the nights were warm. Stepping foot in anywhere the shade had not cloaked during midday was a lesson I had so harshly learned. Travel was slow, but eventful. Wandering the arid wastes was a delightful experience. Many creatures prowled during the day, creatures I made sure to distance myself from due to an unsavory encounter I had before.

Eventually, I became timid of anything that moved. I was worried and anxious something or anything would snap at me. If I sensed any signs of aggression or disparity I was swift to quit for another place. At first I was cautious. I did not want to burn myself amongst the scorching sands but soon I did not come to care. Later I would cradle or whimper inside cracks, crevices or caves just large enough I could fit into. This became a habit. The feeling of enclosed walls, an unknown sensation, was comforting to me. I took to it that whenever I had slept, I would be curled within.

Time would come to pass. I soon found myself hidden in a familiar cave only to be discovered by some odd creature. The light of the sky was high and bright, doing wonders to cast a tall shadow of the figure as it edged deeper towards from the lip of the cave. It's steady pace was met by my further retreat. When I could retreat no longer, I cowered, shoving my eyes into my arms as I awaited some uncertain fate. Yet I was not greeted with pain but rather, a tone.

"Are you well...?"

The meaning of these syllables did not catch my attention. Though I was lulled for a moment, my response was only to further bury myself along with shutting of my eyes as tight as I much as was allowed. But I could still hear the clacks of the being's footsteps. One, two, three, a slight echo following each. Then a shuffle.

A moment before more words broke through the silence, "It is alright. You are safe with me, child."  
>I remained motionless, refusing to spare myself even a single breath.<p>

"It is alright," it repeated as I could feel a reassuring hand on my head. "A timid thing, you. Seem to be lacking decency, as well... Looted by a desert rogue, mayhap..?" the feminine voice mused.

Carefully I lifted my head, wary I may provoke. It was a while before fear released the lock on my gaze. She was draped in the darkness of the cave but I could discern the ever so faint outline of a smile, "Hm. Hello, little one."

I blinked. Once. Twice. Thrice. My gaze unfaltering as I devoured and attempted to analyze all of her features. Atop her head seemed to be fluffy tufts. Like a rabbit. I'd the impulse to reach and grab them but I quickly stopped myself upon remembering how the quickly the rabbits of the sands snapped.  
>The rabbit-like woman stood from her crouch and made three steps backwards before extending a hand, "Can you stand?"<p>

I ignored the gesture and remained where I was. I did not move until she took more steps backwards and beckoned. Outside of the cave it was dusk. The woman was much taller than I and indeed did she have fluffy ears of a rabbit. She was adorned in a fitting brown and red cloak, hair dyed black as night, and an ornate pole clutched to the side. Presumably to serve as a weapon.

And from there, I followed. To where, I did not know. But I felt comfort around this woman, who I had later learned to be named Ay'ada. Come nightfall, we had arrived at an encampment that featured a fantastic flame blazing in the center. Some others gathered around the fire but kept to themselves. Like a moth, I was drawn to the flame. I lied upon the sand, finding rhythm in the cracks of embers as they soon lulled me asleep.

Come dawn, the morning was cool, the nearby river offering a light mist that embraced all nearby in a dew. Much to my dismay, the flame had dispersed, only waning embers left in its wake. I stood and wandered until I heard a familiar voice.  
>"Sleep well, Ay'ada?" an accented masculine voice intrigued.<p>

The reply was quaint, quiet, making sure not to disturb any others who had still been dreaming in the nearby huts, "I am well. And what of you?"  
>"This and there. So tell me, who was the girl...?" he interrupted himself before beginning to hand some articles to the viera, "And no need to ask, I already have some garments ready for her."<p>

"You've my thanks."

"Heh. Nothing really. Just a few more favors left afterall. Might as well get it over with, eh?" Ay'ada's eyes softened as the man continued. "As I was saying, where'd you find her?"

"Stumbled upon her as I hunted. I found naught a mark. Instead, the hume girl."

"Hm?"

"Initially I thought she a beast that scattered to the caves and so I followed."

"Good thing you didn't have a bow, eh?"

The humor wasn't so well received as Ay'ada's expression stiffened ever slightly, "I shall believe a desert rogue had befuddled the girl and robbed her decency. I've not any other intrigue, after all."

"Aye, aye, get what you mean-..." the man coughed a few times before clearing his throat, "...But what will you do with her now, hm?"  
>"She shall find home here until I think otherwise."<p>

The man's tone was somewhat alarmed, "Absolutely not. We've barely supplies for the other families, food especially."

"It shall only be for a moment's end. On the contrary, I go to hunt within the hour and I shall not be back 'till spoils are met."

"...That does not change what I said." The man chastised. "Besides, you've been hunting in your spare time for nearly a week now, what makes you think today shall be any different? This is a terrible season, a terrible year, just more reasons why we plan to pack to Giza you know," he continued calmly.

"...I am aware," was the somber response. The man's expression molded around an empathy.

"I didn't mean to dash your hopes, just tryin' to be realistic."

Humming in halfhearted agreement, Ay'ada walked away towards the exit of the village.  
>I could only watch innocently as I peaked from behind a building. My eavesdropping was soon noticed though, by none other the man who had spoken to Ay'ada, "Oh girl, it's you."<p>

I could only gaze curiously in silence.

"...No need to be so exciting. Well, some people may not like the morning...Anyways, what is your name? Oh, right, here..." He gestured to me to take something. The articles of cloth and silk that were presented to Ay'ada.

"For you. Can't have you running around the camp completely indecent."

"...Well make do, I'll wait until you're finished," the man continued, sharply turning around. A few moments later, nothing was done aside from me unfolding the laundry and casting a glance over it. Falsely assuming, the man turned back to me and gradually adopted a bewildered expression.

"You've no idea how to work a tunic and trousers...? Honestly? Do I have to dress you like a babe?"

I made no response. The man began to mutter some profanities as he snatched the articles from my hands. Then like a limp doll, I was dressed. The tunic was like a feather and lightly colored, along with the trousers in question which while alike in lightness, were fairly spacious, darker and stopped above the ankles.  
>They offered free movement but their glide across my skin took moments to get used to. After a while, I quite liked it.<p>

"Hm. Doesn't look bad. Hand-me-downs from some poor fool though. So, mind telling me your name?"

Of all the syllables, the pronunciation of the word 'name' clicked. Clicked like a key browsing through tumblers. As I repeated the word in question within my mind in awe, something slipped through my thoughts and out of my mouth.

"Ill-e-ree-ah." I blinked, confused at what I had just uttered. "Illyria...!?" A sensation of accomplishment blossomed inside my chest, but...

"Uh...Illyria? Interesting name. Archadian maybe? Eh, nevermind. Be sure to tell that to Ay'ada that. Damn viera was insisting you were nameless but I guess she didn't even bother to even ask." The man patted my shoulder with a quirked eyebrow before moving past.

"Have some things to attend to, take care."

After that, I wandered the village. Dawn had arrived but no other roamed the village so I was free. On the edge of the village was a wide rapid. Learning my lesson after my first attempts and having nearly drowned, I dared not venture far lest I had been swept away.

And so I idled until dusk, waiting for Ay'ada to return. Yet before any chance of waiting, dreams had come to claim me.

The next morning I would find Ay'ada discussing once more with the man, adorning a serious expression. Out of the corner of her eyes, she caught me within her glance. The man took notice of her distracted attention and turned.

"Ey, girl, come over here!"

I took soft steps forward and blinked.

"She has something to tell ya, I hear," he said warmly. I could only stand to a still while keeping sights with Ay'ada, "...Well, girl? Don't keep her waiting."

I presented myself with a cheery smile, "Illyria!"

"There we go, not so hard now, is it? And to think you thought her to be an idiot."

Ay'ada directed a sharp glance towards the man, "You are far too quick to demean upon knowing I had simply pondered the possibility.'"

"Hold your Chocobos, you know I ain't mean it like that at all. All in all, it doesn't even seem like she knows what we're saying now." He waved a hand erratically in front of me and started mumbling gibberish in hopes of a response.

But little did he know, I was fully aware and understanding of what he said at the time. The pattern seemed the more days come to pass, the more knowledge I was endowed, but by what force of wisdom? To that, even I unknowing. Even still, my mouth remained stitched, steadfast alike stone.

"You would be wise to quit your mocking."

The man recomposed himself with respect, "And you are far too stingy and formal, even for a Viera. What's wrong, Ay'ada? You're not usually like this."

"...I am left with no choice but to...-"

"Head to Rabanastre in hopes for a trade?"

"Yes."

"Though it's a bit of an obvious goal considering things, I do not believe you have anything to trade with. Unless you were to put yourself for hire."

There was a jolted response, "I would highly advise against souring my name once more! Do not think me to low myself even to that. I am aware I've a responsibility but I would not sully my honor in such a fashion!"

The man was incredulous.

And as all of this was conspiring, I took the time to sit down in the sands, watching people stare at the two argue while drawing circles around me. A fond sensation, truly. As eventide washed away the light, the grains that slipped through my fingers began to cool. Enthralled with the sensations, I would make the motion more than once. Sticking my digits beneath the earth, to turn then to pull back and stare in fascination as the grit spilled to the land. All the while I still retained focus on their words. How they said them. If they were to raise volume erratically, the drum in my chest would flutter, my breaths quickening, an uneasy sensation I knew not to make go away.

"...I didn't mean it like that, Ay'ada! To think you'd jump at me, thinking you a whore?"

"...I apologize."

"It's fine, it's fine. Remember, you're not our only hunter. Well, huntress more like. We have the others. Mentions to the caravan system a friend recently connected us to."

"But if it is as you said, what have we to barter?"

"The kiddies have picked some pretty stones and other rocks that have washed up from the river. Could make us a pretty penny."

Ay'ada brushed a slow hand through tendrils of hair and messaged her head, "I am tired."

The man looked at her softly, "We all are, Ay'ada. We all are."

He turned to check on me but my direct stare into his eyes caused him to retract his gaze.

"But still, what about her? When we migrate, we'd be on our way to Rabanastre anyways, you may as well take her. Could find help.'  
>I slowed my arms as I focused had been said and what was being said. Rabanastre sounded akin to a location rather than an object. Oh...?<p>

After a moment of thought, Ay'ada murmured in agreement, "...Rabanastre sounds a plan."

"Compared to Fort Nalbina, sure. Days to weeks I suppose. And like I said, in a month we're going to Giza anyways, just waiting on the caravans," the man assured. "Take that girl, see if you can get any useful supplies, even if there is nothing to trade Gil would be very useful for the caravans to come. Who knows, you could find someone versed in Alchemy."

"Alchemy...?"

"Yeah, I just thought about it now. Apparently in the war, the Imperials drugged their prisoners and caused them to go delirium. Made them lose any memory of themselves after a while. And eventually, death..."

A nod of agreement from Ay'ada, "A fair thought. An Alchemist it is."

"So if that is the case, you should be grateful she acknowledges her name at all."

"You were the one to mock her."

"You knew I only joked..."

The rest of their chatter I had drowned out. I was eased, they had quit raising their voices. Even after they had left, departing to me only fleeting glances of what I assumed to be pity, I remained, drawing circles and nonsense characters. Sleep would assail, but this time with another.

_ The scenery was eerie, a fog pranced around the ground.  
>The sky was pitched black, black like night, stars, dim and bright, dotting the surface.<br>Across the canvas, tendrils of colors danced and wavered in place, reflecting and refracting.  
>A seat for conquerors, the aureate throne.<br>A bounty for kings, the heavens themselves.  
>In the throne, an ephemeral being.<br>In the throne, it spoke but yet was unspeakable.  
>Mouth parting, but unmoving.<br>Like a puppet, strings loosened, set to only bow upon knee, head arched.  
>Betwixt, I felt, tugging of fate.<br>In the throne, it waves illusory hand.  
>In the throne, it commands.<br>Abhor, the aura.  
>Abroad, destined not I to be.<br>In the throne, it tugs.  
>In the throne, it commands.<br>To a stand, I go.  
>Through this place, begone I shall be, welcomed by parting of inscribed doors.<br>In the throne, therein naught lies.  
>In the throne, black as ink, painting the sky, white silhouettes.<br>To me, loss of all.  
>To me, loss of every.<br>In the throne, therein naught lies.  
>In the throne, the wheel locks, the wheel turns.<br>Unnatural, 'tis heresy.  
>Unlawful, 'tis sacrilege.<br>In the throne, the wheel locks, the wheel turns.  
>In the throne, the wheel turns, the coffer cracks.<em>

Come morning, Ay'ada had awoken me. An unwelcome prospect, the dream world was something I had looked forward to every slumber, but I had not announced complaints. The man had stocked the woman with a variety of supplies that were presumably stored within the pack that hung firmly off her back. Her weapon was clasped steadfast like a walking stick in her right.  
>The last gift I had received was a pair of handcrafted leather kicks. To not be punished by the merciless sand heated by the midday sun was a great boon and for that, I was glad.<p>

Farewells from the village were quaint, nobody so much as offering me an eye but for Ay'ada there were few wishes.  
>Condolences away, we departed.<br>Contrary to what the man had told Ay'ada, the venture to Rabanastre was not as simple as a mere few days. Often we had to camp, often to mend wounds from foul beasts encountered astray. Though dispatched with a few swift blows and crack of bones, the woman made sure my such safety was of precedence. Dimwitted creatures as they were, instinct and observation could tell any matter of being of my vulnerability. Such martyrdom would inflict Ay'ada with wounds or scratches. Scratches were mended with the warmth of glowing, pale blue light. Wounds would require moderate rest. Often I would grow impatient, yearning to go on yet the dark-skinned woman had always managed to instill a calm within me.

As the days crawled on, so did we our journey.  
>Apart the occasional flock of beasts, there were no incidents.<br>Some days we would cross expanses full of naught but dunes, others slipping through the crags and cracks of beautiful canyons.  
>Come a fateful night, the woman looked grim upon rummaging through the supplies. She would later voice that though water was moderate despite my constant thirst, food was dwindling, a small few fistfuls of grain and salted tenders of meat remaining. My ignorance would be my shortcoming.<br>The following days, though my thirst was slated, hunger had begun to pang my stomach. Though food was still available, Ay'ada had taken to rationing it sparingly. To me, the world had slowed and seemed annoying yet the woman making me suffer did not show signs as I did.

A week would come to pass before we were to encounter a sheltered few stone cottages tucked under the ledge of a tall hill. Here we were told, this place a trading outpost, Rabanastre being only a single days worth of travel. Quaint details of else were that the route to the royal city was rendered safe to efforts of the patrols of soldiers and to merchant and mercenary alike who had often cleared the way of fiends.  
>I would later learn that Ay'ada had attempted to barter a quaint few pretty stones for food and drink, but her offer declined.<br>My stomach had come to ravage me, my legs fumbling to a stand. It was if my stomach had grown hands and reached for my skin upon the inside, begging for nourishment.

A day later, though grueling, we arrived upon the Royal City of Rabanastre, a glorious sight to behold that was protected with monolithic, beautifully fashioned stone walls. Above, in the stead of clouds, intricate hulls of steel and wood would propel above by mechanisms unknown.  
>Yonder the horizon, waiting structures looming high that dwarfed even the orb of light in the sky, I myself being caught in one of what seemed to be many long shadows. Beyond us, a one of few massive gates, a variety of people begging entrance of the guards who managed such a contraption.<br>To the left, a glimmering and glorious azure crystal hovered afloat, unfaltering in motion as children and adults alike pricked gently its surface with their digits, to become embraced in an emerald aura.

Curious of this, I mimicked them and tapped the surface, relishing as my spine quivered while the aura washed over me. Upon my next breath, it felt as my heart skipped several beats, as if I was capable of triumphing over anything this would could have to offer. A child next to me looked directly into my eyes and beamed an innocent smile.

"Feels nice, huh!?" the boy said.

"Nice..." I returned the expression, excited.  
>The boy and his friends seemed to have been playing a game with the crystal. Like a dance, they skipped and hopped, tagging the crystal and each other. Every tap renewing their vim and vigor, another chorus of sweet laughter. Before long, I decided to take after to their game. Enjoying each and every mindless roundabout. Another chorus of laughter from I and them.<p>

To me, all was lost, I was fulfilled but more than I could have imagine was ready to be indulge. New sounds, new colors, new people, new kinds of people. The warks of giant birds, gold of feather, upright men of cold, scaled skin and snout, men embraced in leather and metals, a clap upon steps.  
>This was the Royal City of Rabanastre. I would like to call this my new home.<p> 


End file.
